Can't Seem To Die

Time flows
But this wound still surprises me
I stomped hard on that dying ember somewhere within
Thickened the layers of frost around my heart
Hoping to numb whatever it is that im feeling
Couldn't say what i truly feel
Instead i say what i thought was right
Hearing your voice made me truly realized i haven't stopped missing you
Even while asking God to remove this pain I cried at the thought that
It could mean letting go of how much you meant to me
How could i think like this?
Am i stupid?
To hold onto what is left of your traces even if it is pain
I really, really didn't know i have the capacity to love someone like this
Even when our future is a black hole
I should've given up already
And it's not like i did'nt try
I lived each day, i charged forward, i danced, i sing, i laughed, i have fun
For i couldn't even dare to hope and ask God for another chance
Yet that tiny stubborn little spark, even though buried over and over again under the dirt,
Can't seem to die.